not_a_troll | 6.5 [anything goes]

[Billy waits quietly, just letting him get it all out in the open. He knows this is needed sometimes, venting and ranting- and the only thing he can really offer is a sympathetic ear and some advice at this point. People need to deal with their grief in their own way.]

If you guys are really best friends, I'm sure she'd understand. It was just an experiment, and people did a lot of things they regret. I know I did.

[Loki paces through the room, obviously trying to keep his cool. He is not fond of anger or frustration but right now it keeps building up inside of him. Obviously he has never really had a reason to let it all out. But this reason right here is quite a very valid one.]

No. I am not sure, and I never will be sure.

[Finally he stops pacing and looks at Billy again. For a really long time, at least until the anger subsides and makes place for plans and plots.

His mind starts reeling about how to get back to Asgardia as soon as possible.]

Speaking of regrettable events. I shall tell you something. Something regrettable and secret. And don't you dare speak about it to anyone. If so, I will demote you from bro to vague, far away acquaintance.

What happened, Junior? Lose your girlfriend?

_{[ Behind the snark is real concern, though. A missing person is nothing to laugh at. ]}

[Loki's eyes shift from left to right and he grits his teeth briefly. Aang's words are awfully comforting and a good summary of what goes through him at this moment.]

It is a dreadful feeling, isn't it?

[The tone of his voice is soft.]

Losing the one that gives you hope? You feel lonely, yet you aren't.

It is. But those times when you feel like you're alone... That's when it helps the most to know you're really not. There's always people that can give you hope. And even if someone so important to you's gone... their love'll always be in your heart. That much won't leave you alone.

[He tries to speak slowly and softly to Loki, to help him realize that.]

Explain me what exactly isn't terribly obvious about my message, Kirk.

You should've told me that earlier. Tacking up a horse is quite a hassle and my patience is wearing incredibly thin, you see?

[Loki nods shortly when Pepper enters before he crouches down and rummages through a brown shoulderbag. He fishes out a flashlight and a long scarf.]

That I have wept? No. Your secret is safe with me. If you were in a predicament like this you might have wept as well. And probably more since you are female.

[He hands Pepper the flashlight.]

Climb onto Frakki first, take the back of the saddle, I'll squeeze in in front. You take the flashlight, I take the horse.

This is a concept called team work.

You are kind.

[Loki smiles briefly. Not one of those overly warm or bright smiles he uses to cover up whatever lie that has come from his mouth. But a small and sincere one.]

I am not sure if her love is inside my heart, since Leah is not quite aware of the entire concept of love. But I understand the sentiment.

[He returns his own warm smile.]

Well... Even if someone doesn't know what it is, if they care, then there's still some love there. It's not the same as having the person there, but just that little piece can still do good.

[Billy's brows furrow at that - he's pretty good with other peoples' secrets, besides the fact that he tells Teddy everything, since they're just that sort of couple. But this sounds serious.]

Um. Yeah, of course. My word is my bond, and all that. What is it?

I didn't realize you were going to tack up a horse for me.

[Pepper's gentle when she replies, but Loki only gets so many licenses. She holds back an urge to sigh when he sees right through her attempt, though she's a bit curious when he hands her the flashlight.]

You're still going to go looking. [She would've thought the tears were a sign of him giving up his denial, and she's a little surprised to hear otherwise.]

Look, Junior, didn't mean to get snarky.

When did she disappear? Where from?

[Loki eyes Billy for a couple more minutes, making up his mind, clearing his head.]

I am still quite unsure about whatever bond you share with my other older self, and it is not my right to pry. So I shall not. But I do want to ask you to not interpret my words as me trying to damage his name, yes? Yes.

It is a general misconception. Me trying to damage him.

[He sits down on the bed, trying hard to not let the fact that the apartment is empty get to him.]

A while ago, a long while ago, even before I died, I had a conversation with one of the characters from the Midgardian series of Star Trek. The ones that get beamed up a lot. In passing I mentioned something about my other older self being a bit more evil than I am. I deemed it rather harmless, Spock of the Enterprise deemed it rather serious and went to my other older self.

[Loki raises a finger.]

Are you familiar with the phrase 'flipping shit', Billy of New York? I think my other older self has flipped a shit, you see? He flipped such an amount of shit, so to speak, that...eventually Luke Skywalker of Star Wars contacted me and requested me to attend a meeting with the other party in order to make peace.

He pointed out to me that my other older self is dangerous and that his mind is rather unstable. This is not news to me, of course. What is news to me is that he informed me about the lives that are at stake if I would not comply. As if I hold the key to my other older self's mental stability. To be put in such a position is quite odd...

[Loki looks up to Billy again, pausing his very long, long story.]

Am I still clear to you? If there are any questions so far I am willing to answer them.

[That's... complicated. And a bit messy. For a moment Billy is taken aback, not sure what to say or do. He mulls it over quietly for a bit, brows furrowed.

As usual, handling issues with Loki - either of them - is tricky, isn't it...]

I think... it's not just you. Who should be careful about him, I mean. We're all kind of tiptoeing around and keeping an eye on him. It's not like you or anyone else is responsible for him, mentally or otherwise. It's just- don't stick your fingers in the tiger's cage, you know? We don't want to piss him off when he's a timebomb just waiting to go off.

[Hrngh... he hates how that sounds like it's still this Loki's responsibility. How to phrase it... uh...]

Look, you're friends with Saori, right? And you're pretty close. BFFs and whatnot. Think about how you'd feel - and how she'd feel - if I went to her and told her that you're evil, just because you're Loki. Wouldn't you both have a problem with that?

[Loki shakes his head.]

Yes? So you would go to Saori and tell her I am evil since I am Loki. And she would ask you 'how is Loki evil? what evil things has he done?' And what would you answer? Besides 'well, he is Loki.'?

[Really, Billy? Really?]

That argument is completely and utterly invalid. It is not a correct representation of how it went.

I did not say it on purpose. It was a mere slip of the tongue. That is what it was. If you envision me walking towards Spock of the enterprise with the words 'Hello, Spock, please listen to my words, my older self is a creature of malice and pure evil', you are dreadfully wrong.

[It was a half-truth. He said it on purpose, yet he had never expected Spock to contact his older self about it.]

But my grand tale of regrettable events is not over yet. It has a startling and confusing finale.

During the meeting we came to an agreement that I did not agree with. I asked my older self to not contact Leah because...I wish...wished to protect her from him. I am not afraid of his words but I am afraid of what he can do.

Of course that did not stand. And of course I have not been aware that Leah and him had already met and that she had been following his lessons in magic.

Alas.... It does not really matter anymore. She went back to Asgardia and she is safe there. But what I do know that I have failed epically when it comes to protecting her. And I cannot undo that. It is a feeling that lingers and frankly, I miss her already.

Ah...

[Loki thinks about it.]

...for now, the memories of her feel less good then I want them to be. I guess it takes some time.

I also think I need some...'alone time' right now...

Then do not get snarky. If I am willing to receive snark and return snark I will let you know. You are on the top of my list, you see?

[He pauses briefly.]

I cannot pinpoint an exact time, but she isn't here anymore. We have spend the feast of Valentines together, a couple of days after she disappeared.

You're sure she wasn't taken by the Malnosso? Kidnapped? This place isn't that big, so I think you would have found her by now if she was just off on a shopping trip or something.

I see. [His smile fades somewhat.] I think it will take time for the memories to be more comforting. It's a pain that's still very fresh.

[And he gives an understanding nod while putting a hand on his friend's shoulder.]

If you need to be alone, that's fine. Just make sure that if you feel like you need a "bro", you let me know, alright?

Perhaps I have not been clear enough. My apologies.

[It sounds a bit half-assed and he sighs.]

Yes, I still am going to look for her. I am quite aware of how foolish that might sound. I am not one for giving up. I have to rule out all options.

After that chances are quite big that I will weep some more.

I do not wish to forget them.

[Loki's voice sounds rather firm when he says that.]

But it is quite painful to realize that Leah is not around anymore. Therefore I just need...

[His voice falters a bit and his shoulders slump a bit.]

Aye, I shall keep it in mind. [He pats Aang's back quickly.] But for now I really have to take my leave.

[Because he can feel tears stinging behind his eyes and he prefers to do his weeping alone.]

Leah is not one for shopping. She is gone and I cannot find her. I am quite at the end of my wits.

[That isn't exactly what Billy was trying to imply, but Loki's already moved on and Billy doesn't feel like backtracking just to pick a fight, so he merely frowns and shrugs it off. Intent very rarely means much in situations like this, but that's a hard thing to get across to someone who's already angry and upset.]

It would be weird if you didn't miss her. And it's really hard to protect someone who doesn't want to be protected, too. Did you talk to her about your worries when it comes to the other Loki?

I did. She dismissed it. I knew she would. And I could not do anything. I have been bound by that agreement I made.

Breaking it would mean that I would tamper with my older self's mental state, yes? People would die. It would all be my fault...again.

[Loki notices he is getting angry. Really angry. That type of anger that comes to the surface once or twice in his life. The anger he felt after he left the meeting with empty hands. So he squeezes his eyes shut and pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to control his breathing.

After all, he was stronger than this.]

Well, calm down, panicking isn't going to find her. If you can't find her here in town that means there are a few options:

She went off into the woods.

The Malnosso kidnapped her.

She got sent home.

None of them are exactly pleasing - well, maybe that last one is - but they're what we have to work with as plausible.

6.5 [anything goes]

[action!] it was a gagtag silly 8D

[action!] Now I want them to have a rapbattle :"O

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[action!] billy would fail so spectacularly at that

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[action!] loki will misunderstand everything, it will be fabulous

[action!] loki will misunderstand everything, it will be fabulous

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