not_a_troll | 2. [video]/[action]

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2. [video]/[action]

[Video]
[When the feed turns on Loki is obviously sitting on his bed, looking intently at whoever is listening. The message he has for everyone is of great importance after all. Finally he opens his mouth, voice firm.]

Land of Luceti! There is something that has come to my attention and I see it as my duty to enlighten you about this, yes?

[He leans closer to the screen because this is a most serious matter, everyone.]

I shall tell you my name and then I shall explain you what usually follows.

My name is Loki...

[He pulls a face and when he continues his voice is higher as if he is mimicing a woman.]

Oh my! Your name is Loki! Shall I tell you about this other Loki who is also most definitely Loki?

[After that Loki clears his throat.]

Land of Luceti, I am very aware of my older self's presence, you see? It pains me to see how everyone wastes their time on pointing that out to me every time I mention my name.

[He smiles a broad and very, very nice smile.]

If there are any questions, please let me know. I am very fond of answering questions, yes?

[That is a lie.]

[Action
[Later that day Loki heads out to the forest to do some exploring. He still hopes to find his way back to Asgard, even though his opinion about this village and some of its inhabitants is leaning towards a more positive one.

He plans to go more in the direction of those mountains when something gray, firebreathing and extremely foulmouthed catches his attention. Actually, he is very ~~pleasantly~~ surprised.]

By Odin's empty eyesocket! Thori!

[Loki turns away from the small path he has been following into the bushes to fetch his beloved dog and scratch it between its ears. After that he lifts the dog up and holds it in his arms.

The dog lets its disapproval known by letting out an impressive amount of profanities. Loki merely shakes his head.]

Hush, Thori, you are a good dog, remember?

[Loki has left this letter for Asch to read. Neatly typed on a typewriter.]

To Asch the Bloody,

I am very delighted that I got the honour to write a man whose last name is "The Bloody". It implies that one is a bloodthirsty murderer who likes to end the lives of his victims in a most bloody way.

Are you fond of bloody murder, Asch the Bloody? I find it rather gross. After all, bloodstains are quite difficult to remove from one's clothing. And it is unnecessary messy.

Do enlighten me about your bloody adventures, Asch the Bloody. I am most interested!

From: Loki Laufeyson, apartmentbuilding 5, room 25.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

They had my clothes at the shop.

Are your clothes also made'a unstable molecules?

Chemistry is not my field of expertise, I am afraid.

But my clothes are made of a most comfortable fabric that allows me to move freely, that is something that I know for sure.

Heh. Well if y'can find somth'n like that in my size that won't go sideways when I walk, sure. I kinda doubt ya will though. Not much here that fits me that don't already come from m'own closet.

I am Loki, of course I can find something in your size, Ben!

Right. How'd I ever doubt ya?

Indeed! Never doubt Loki.

[Loki smiles broadly. And if Ben was being sarcastic, he decides to ignore it.]

Doubt'n Lokis never ends well f'anyone.

[Okay, the kid's cute. He can ignore the connection to one of the most unpleasant individuals he's ever rumbled ewith.]

You get it, Ben Grimm!

When one doubts me, I can be most vile and evil and won't rest before I have brought Asgard down to its knees very violently and...things like that, et cetera, et cetera.

Got a bigger one of you in my world that's tried that a coupla times. Never went well f'him. Kinda made it rough f'that bigger version of you here when I landed in his house.

...should prolly send him a fruitbasket or somth'n.

[Oh? Now Loki sees a possibility. Because Ikol is not quite willing to tell him about how he has spend his pasttimes and especially what he has caused in the past. And...wait...did he land on top of his older self's house?

Loki starts to chuckle.]

That is extremely funny! His face must have been a most priceless one, Ben!

How does my older self look in your world? Is it the same one that lives here? Or do I exist in every different universe?

Offered me tea. Looked kinda surprised t'see me, even more surprised f'me to get so mad. We don't get along where I'm from.

[It's a bit of an understatement, that. Ben shrugs and scrubs a bit at his rocky jaw.]

The older you that's hear looks just like the you in my world that I don't like much. Not the same guy, though. I'm kinda hard t'forget. He'd remember if it were th'same guy.

Do not worry, Ben Grimm, I am very aware of my older self's reputation. So I am not really surprised with your not being able to get along with him, you see?

[At the second part Loki frowns and shakes his head.]

Definitely not. My older self wears a helmet with horns, and a great amount of most fluffy decorations. He does not at all look like the one here.

Yet, I do believe he is my older self.

But not the one I am familiar with.

More t'how a person looks than what they wear kiddo. But yeah, same face, minus the horns and muppet shoulder pads.

[Him but not him. That's odd in more ways than one, and Ben really wishes that Reed were here.]

Jump a few worlds over and ya run inta this stuff all the time. Alternate younger, older, age'n sideways versions of yourself run'n around. Hard t'keep it straight after awhile.

The concept itself isn't unfamiliar to me. Yet, I wonder how much my older self is me instead of the older self I know, yes?

[Because if he is...he should be cautious, he should be extremely wary and prepare for whatever the other could pull.

He should always be one step ahead. After all, this one wasn't a magpie that accompanied him, this one was a tall one, walking around on two legs.]

If he's from th'world I think he is? Can't say f'sure kiddo. Sorry 'bout that.

[Keeping this kind of thing straight was hard, and Lokis were always squirrely folk. It could be a big act, a lie to make Ben leave him alone. He's not sure yet. What he could do, though, is keep an eye out for the kid. Besides. It's a kid. Can't let them get into trouble now can he?]

But if he gives you trouble you just lemme know. I'll set him straight. Or crooked. Heh.

Do not apologize, Ben.

[Loki shakes his head to emphasize that and raises his eyebrows after the next proposal. It is useful and Loki likes that. He chuckles softly.]

I shall. Even though I am fairly sure he won't give me any trouble.

Kid. He's Loki.

[And that explains everything about the Asgardian. Ever. He's Loki, so he's lying. He's Loki, so he's going to stab you. He's Loki, so he's going to be a big @$$ all the time so get used to it.]

If he ain't mak'n trouble for someone he ain't breath'n.

And I am Loki as well. But I am not that Loki.

[He makes it sound as if it is the same thing as pointing out that the sun is shining outside.]

But I appreciate your worry, I really do, yes?

You're also a kid.

[Which meant he was more and less likely to cause trouble, and that whatever trouble the kid made was less likely to get someone killed. Turned blue or into a frog? Yeah. Killed? Not so much.]

...an if anyone else gives ya trouble ya can come t'me. Not just him. Got it?

Aye, there is no doubt about that. I am most definitely a child.

[Loki smiles broadly, honestly quite touched by the offer but not really trusting in the kindness of people. Or famous superheroes.

Not that he didn't want to trust in such things, he just isn't able to do so.]

Definitely. I suspect you will pummel them greatly!

Clobber, I clobber people greatly. Heh. And often, if they make trouble. No one's been mak'n it here, though, so no clobber'ns been done.

Ben Grimm of the great Clobbering!

[Loki grins.]

A name that befits my sidekick.

Better than what th' PR team at home came up with. [He rumbles a low chuckle. It's a LOT better than what he's usually called.] Loki of Magic an' Mischief and Ben Grimm of th' Great Clobber'n. Kinda catchy.

PR Team? What does a team of PR do?

[Loki is completely unfamiliar with that word. But he laughs at Ben's suggestion.]

Aye! I approve of this.

[Even though the magic-part was rather non-existant at this point. But well, no one needs to know such things.]