not_a_troll | 1. [accidental sound --> video]

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1. [accidental sound --> video]

[Everyone who is listening can hear the sound of leaves rustling followed by a soft groan coming from someone's mouth.

After that there are footsteps that slowly fade away but get louder again after a minute or two. Apparently someone discovered the book and the small yelp followed by a referral to Odin's empty eye socket might give the impression that someone managed to step into a pinecone with his bare foot.

There is more rustling and a soft thud, the sound of someone opening a book and...]

Oh! It is a Midgardian recording device in a book!

How perfectly...impractical!

[Since the owner of this voice, Loki Laufeyson from Asgard, is really fond of any Midgardian way of communicating through long-distance connections he figures the book out in a rather quick way.

Eventually his face appears on everyone's feed, finger tapping against the screen to test if it might be a screen of touch, like his own phone of Stark used to have.]

Everyone! I figure this book of communication has been left to me with a certain purpose. So I shall ask for your aid, yes?

[Loki takes a deep breath.]

First of all, someone has provided me with white pants, yet has forgotten to give me a proper shirt. Second of all, I am fairly sure this is not Broxton.

Is there a town nearby? At least one where I can get proper garments?

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[Providing entertainment just happens to be Oswald's reason for being! He's got this.]

Kid, I could put my head where my foot is, my foot where my tail is, my tail where my arm is and my arm where my head is. [...] If I wanted to, that is. It's the kinda puzzle that takes a while to be put back together and I'd rather not lose any of my limbs in the process. But just for you...

[And then he lops off his right leg, drops his head onto the ground and moves over it to have his right ear attach as if it were a new leg.]

[Loki sits there, absolutely glued to the screen. After all, one did not see a rabbit juggling around his bodyparts every day.]

Oh! You should put your head on your belly and your feet on your back. That way you will be very small.

[He grins broadly. And he wishes Leah was around so he could show her this. She probably would not appreciate it as much as he did, but minor details.]

[Oswald snorts in amusement as he pulls his head up from the ground again and tosses it up, catching it squarely between the shoulders where it belongs.]

What am I, a circus clown? If so, I can do a better impression than that. [He pulls off both his ears and starts juggling them, along with the right leg he was still holding. Having only one leg to balance on doesn't make him any less of a decent juggler.]

Yes! Yes you are! And a very talented one as well!

[Loki laughs, almost forgetting he was sitting in a forest without a shirt and a book in his lap looking at a rabbit doing tricks.]

You should juggle your head!

Sure thing! Watch this!

[He throws the ears and the leg up high into the air, then uses the momentary pause to lift his head off his shoulders again. Then he continues juggling the four appendages.]

[Loki smiles broadly, honestly entertained by all of this. And suddenly he notices something... Yes, those are definitely small wings on the rabbit's back.]

I should warn you. To be a flying rabbit as well, you should get larger wings.

[Currently he's unaware of the situation on his own back...]

[He stops juggling and throws his appendages high up into the air again. The head lands neatly where it belongs and the two ears land on top immediately afterwards. A short silence follows, then a look of realization dawns on Oswald's face and he holds out his hand to catch the remaining leg right on time.]

If I want to be a flying rabbit, all I have to do is twirl my ears like helicopter blades. These wings on my back here are just for decoration. Everyone here has 'm and they're the permanent kind, so I couldn't get rid of them even if I wanted to.

[Then it dawns to Loki that there are two wings attached to his back as well, and no, there is no glue involved. So this is not part of some strange Midgardian Halloween festivity.

Loki is not quite sure if he is amused with this.]

What is the gist of this?

[By Odin's beard, he can even move them.]

Like I said, everyone has 'm and they're the permanent kind. They say if you manage to remove 'm by force, you die, and I'm not one to test that.

These wings are my life source? That is ludicrous!

[What could they be otherwise? And what has happened?]

I dunno if they're your lifesource- I'd say it's more like if you try to rip off your own head. Errr, for you humans, I mean. It ain't the same for me, because I can rip off my head just fine. But you know what I mean, right? [He pauses for moment, thinking.] Hmmm... Or maybe they are what's keeping you alive here. I forget what the newcomers' guide said about these things.

[It dawns Loki that he is not going to visit any normal village with a Grey Hound vehicle waiting to take him back to Broxton.]

Am I in need of a newcomers' guide? If so...I am going to be introduced to what exactly?

[Strange dark rituals? A village full of Midgardians who feed themselves on other Midgardians?]

Oh, heh, I probably shoulda mentioned that first, huh? Hate to break it to you, kid, but you're in Luceti. It's uh... Well, it's what they call everything inside this barrier. 'Cause we're trapped inside a barrier, see, on another world. We've got a village, a forest, a couple mountains and a beach. That's about all we can get to, unless we sign up for missions and let the Malnosso take us out into the wide world. [...] The Malnosso are the scientists in charge of everything inside the barrier, see, and they uh...

You know what? I'll just let you read the guide. Gimme a sec. [He picks up his journal and starts flipping through it, which is probably going to do wonders for the camera view. Finally, he returns and references to this page right here.]

That's the one!

[That is an entire stream of information and Loki listens intently. He is not particulary fond of the part about being trapped inside a barrier.

And scientists?

After that Loki flips through the manual for newcomers, the frown on his face growing as he does. And yes, he rubs his neck when the tattoo got mentioned.]

So basically, our purpose is to be experimented on. Like Midgardians do with rodents hailing from the country of Guinea.

[The frown on Loki's face deepens.]

This is repulsive.

[Because even the most disliked inhabitant of Asgard has at least a little bit of pride.]

[Oswald has to fight hard not to laugh at "rodents from the country of Guinea". This kid is just precious.]

Yes and no. The people here are great, all the stuff in the stores is free and there's next to no responsibilities. Experiments and wars aside, Luceti's got its perks!

[Loki stays quiet for a long time.]

I have free things back in Asgard as well.

[Free room, free bed made out of hay and a pillow on the hard floor, free food, free clothes, see? A lot of free things. And okay, most Asgardians weren't great.]

Alas.

[Loki gets on his feet. His voice sounds dead serious when he talks again.]

These scientists will regret this.

[Not that he can do magic, or do anything else his older self was capable of, still, Loki is not afraid to abuse such a horrible reputation when a certain situation presents itself.

This situation is definitely one of those certain situations.]

Yeah? If you're determined to find a way to get to 'm, I'll be rooting for you, kid. So, what's your name?

Loki.

I do not expect that they will be easy to locate. After all, antagonists always utilize secret hiding spaces.

[He starts walking.]

Loki... Loki... Where have I heard that name before...? [There is a moment of silence in which Oswald tries to jog his memory. Then, finally, it hits him. There was a warning about this just the other day.]

Waaait a second. Aren't you that guy who used aliens to attack Manhattan?

[Whoa...wait...what?]

[Loki stops walking and pulls a face. He doesn't even have to lie for this.]

I have not done such a thing!

[He knows he has done some very horrible things in the past but this is completely new to him...]

I shall presume one is very fond of films. About aliens attacking Midgardian cities, yes?

One should watch Independence Day.

No no, there was this guy. Steve Something. He said that uh... this guy named Loki hates his brother and that's why he attacked Manhattan with aliens. And uh... Oh yeah, he's a god, too! But he hasn't done anything wrong in Luceti yet.

So if you run into another guy named Loki, that'd be him. Don't ruffle his feathers, 'cause he sounds like a pretty nasty guy.

My older self attacked Manhattan of New York in the company of beings outside the Nine Realms to spite my brother...

[His voice sounds soft, as if he is overthinking this.]

I shall not ruffle anything. But I will seek him out.

Whah- your older self? So you are him?

[Loki shrugs.]

That remains a mystery for now.

[He is not sure and he is not sure if he feels comfortable with the thought his older self is anything else besides a magpie.]

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